Mourning a Breast by Xi Xi

Author:Xi Xi [Xi, Xi]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: Fiction, Medical, World Literature, China, 20th Century, Feminist
ISBN: 9781681378237
Google: C-_bEAAAQBAJ
Publisher: New York Review of Books
Published: 2024-07-08T22:00:00+00:00

MAGIC BULLET

IN ADDITION to sculpting, Henry Moore also produced many drawings. These include depictions of people in caves, miners in tunnels, and refugees in air-raid shelters. The people in the caves stand like ghosts. The miners in the tunnels walk bent over. The refugees in the air-raid shelters lie on the ground along the walls, men and women, the old and the young; their bodies tightly wrapped in cloth resemble mummies. The first time I entered the radiation therapy unit, those images came to mind. The long corridor was filled with despondent-looking people on either side, just like the people in the air-raid shelters, suffering from the ravages of war. Their enemies were external, while ours lurked within.

Like the simulation unit, the radiation therapy unit was also located in the basement of the hospital: an underground space. The first section of the Zuo Tradition, titled “Lord Yin,” narrates a falling-out between Lord Zhuang of Zheng and his mother.19 His mother had helped his younger brother to sow rebellion, and after Lord Zhuang quelled the upheaval, he banished his mother to an outlying place called Chengying, and swore to her: Not until the Yellow Springs of the underworld shall we meet again. Afterward, he regretted this oath. All he could do was follow one of his minister’s schemes and dig a tunnel. When he saw the springs of the underworld, he was finally able to reunite with his mother. The meeting at the Yellow Springs was the turning point of his rebirth. Lord Zhuang’s minister advises him to deal with his mother as soon as possible, the way one would with a virus: It is best to take action early, and not let it spread; once it spreads, it is difficult to control. At that time, land was plentiful and people were few; most lived aboveground, except for some primitive cave dwellers. As the population gradually increased, buildings began to reach for the sky, and also to extend deep underground. In the modern age, banks were built with underground vaults to store gold, cities dug underground railways, and the lower floors of shopping malls were transformed into food courts; the basements of ancient castles became dungeons, and some even expanded into private prisons. Many years ago, in order to evade the atomic bomb, numerous large cities built vast, sprawling shelters underground. I’ve been to these places. Is it an ancestral instinct to believe that being closer to the earth makes us safer? But being too close, and connected to the underworld, is another taboo.

The radiation therapy unit was located in the basement of the hospital and was by no means a playground; rather, it had the air of a dungeon, striking terror into people’s hearts. The basement on this side of the hospital was actually the main hub for cancer treatment. It was divided into the oncology unit, the simulation unit, and the radiation therapy unit. After a reorganization, the breast cancer unit had been moved to the second floor, but other cancer patients were still diagnosed and treated in the basement.

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